Rough sex as signalling in evolutionary terms

As if we needed reminding, here is a reminder that “women have rape fantasies“.

I would certainly be prepared to modify this to “women have fantasies of rough sex with desirable men.”

But why?

On the face of it, rough sex, for both the giver and the receiver, would seem to be disadvantageous. There is the risk of injury obviously.

I think it is possible however to see a man’s desire and capacity to have rough sex as a “costly” or “honest” signal (here). It signals that he is fit in an adaptive sense, and has “good genes”. He has abundant strength and energy. And any sons he sires are likely to have similar traits: ‘sexy son hypothesis‘.

Bodice Ripper, laced back.

(a bodice, waiting to be ripped)

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14 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by katmandutu on November 7, 2015 at 1:03 pm

    Rape is sex against the woman’s will.

    Rape fantasies are simply the thoughts of a woman who wishes to be taken by a desirable man.

    That’s not rape in the true sense.

    Think Rhett Butler and Scarlett O’Hara..

    True rape is sexual assault against a woman’s will, with a man she has no attraction or interest in..

    Reply

  2. Posted by Dash Riprock on November 7, 2015 at 4:55 pm

    Right you are Julian (and Kim)to add the qualifier of a man she finds desirable. And this is not true just for sex but for all aspects of game as well. It’s attraction that drives a women’s responsiveness. To believe otherwise is to ignore reality. That’s why the best advice for the RP novice is always to work on himself, to clean up his side of the street so to speak. Become an attractive, desirable man and results often follow rather quickly.

    Reply

    • That was Kathy actually, not “Kim”.

      I should add that I don’t want to commit the naturalistic fallacy and assume that what is natural is good. But, in religious terms, I do think that ‘grace builds upon nature’. So it is better if a woman feels natural attraction to her husband, and vice versa of course. The problem is that society lies to men about what women find attractive, and women feel no need to tell men the truth – because they feel men should “just know”.

      One thing I have noticed about “game” is that it does not just work on one’s own spouse, it has a positive effect on one’s relations with all women. And one quickly discovers that women, including one’s relatives, will forgive a man a lot if they have him categorised in their minds as an “alpha”.

      I would say to a man who doubts this, to just try some (safe) experiments. I am normally polite to saleswomen, but on rare occasions I have been brusque. Their reactions are quite fascinating. Men should try it, using common sense of course. They might be surprised by the response.

      Reply

  3. Posted by Dash Riprock on November 7, 2015 at 11:16 pm

    My apologies Kathy! Correct Julian and the flip side of the coin is the contempt that females reserve for men they feel don’t measure up or don’t just get it. I have experienced both in my journey from alpha to beta and now thankfully back to alpha. It’s amazing. Pains me as a good Catholic to say that while Nietzsche didn’t know squat about theology the old boy knew more than a thing or two about women!

    Reply

    • The Red Pill ideas are all through literature and philosophy if one knows where to look. And they used to be embedded in the popular culture. I remember red pill messages in TV shows, many of them English, as late as the 1970s.

      The Taming of the Shrew is, from one perspective, the classic red pill play.

      As for Nietzsche, yes, in theory. “Thou goest to woman? Forget not thy whip!”. But in reality Nietzsche was pretty unsuccessful with women, as this photo suggests (Lou Andreas-Salome on the left, Nietzsche on the right):

      tg

      Reply

    • There is a quite a bit of “red pill” in the New Testament for that matter. St Paul in particular – “see that she respects her husband”.

      I am almost sorry to have to say that the best advice I ever heard on women was a random remark by a boy in a Catholic college I was at: “treat ’em mean to keep ’em keen”. There is more truth in that one crude remark than in most books of relationship advice for men.

      Reply

  4. Posted by Jim on November 7, 2015 at 11:58 pm

    Test post. (I’m not seeing my posts so I’m trying again. No spam intended)

    Reply

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